When was your last date? And I don't mean your last random hookup, one night stand or DVD night with your girl-, boy- or best-friend. What I talk about is a date like the kinda date you know from the movies. So? Ever? Nah.
I recently read an article in my favourite magazine (NEON, german one) about the end of dating. Seriously, when I think about it, my whole life I thought this whole dinner-date was an invention made in Hollywood. But it seems like there used to be something like the two-some date some time before I got old enough. Sucks. If you believe in what this nice lady who wrote the article says. And a lot of other people who claim thereselfs to be smart and write books n stuff. So what exactly do they say? If you look arround your folks who are somewhere arround 20-something you'd think they seem to be happy and have relationships and sex and everything awesome that seems to be a side-effect of dating. Right. But: how did they get there? Apperently "our generations'" dates are happening in our peers. When you're on a party it's the most uncomplicated thing to simply invite your crush to join you. And that's what we do. INSTEAD of dating.
CON on that:
1. Suppose you get invited by your crush to hang out with his/her friends. Are you
a) not worth the time to spend alone with?
b) in the Buddy-Trap?
c) a set up for somebody's friend?
d) what you hope to be?
PROs'd be:
1. Your person of interest isn't as great as you thought. Oh great! You don't have to think
of anything to get rid of him/her asap - it's a party!
2. Completely practically: you can tell if he/she is any boy-/girlfriend material, given the fact
that your crush is surrounded by your friends and you can check out how good he/she fits in.
This brings us to
3. 'cause on the other side we have YOU, invited to some party or random hang by your crush.
You can check out the people your going (not?) to be partner likes to hang. Nothing says as
much about a person as the people he/she spends his time with.
So up 'till now it seems like it's not too bad to say au revoir to outdated dating rituals. Isn't this....so sad?
I believe our "free spirits" and crap we claim ourselves to be is leading us to something completely wrong. Or at least not-so-nice. Our easygoing mentality makes us have more than one crush's (there is no plural existent for this word - realize something?). We have far too many opportunities. We spend our time trying to decide. Not trying to work on what we have.
CON:
2. Will we ever decide? Will monogamy be an archaic word? I think we will drive ourselfes
crazy with all of our choices and opportunities.
3. Letting the hopeless romantic speak for me: Where is the LOVE? If we don't take our time
to get to know somebody, to earn their trust and literally learn to love them...will we love? I
got this feeling that a lot of the kids from my generation mistake sex and physical attraction
for what we call love. Count: How many of your friends got together with their (-sorry-)
fuck-buddies or what you want to call them?
So is dating dead? Are we caught in our own dissolute lifestyle? Gett up guys, we're all so vintage and retro and thirftshop-y...why do we hang on to fashion and art but not to lifestyle and culture?
xo V
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